Finances

Entry for November 01, 2006

It's getting cold here. I have no heat in the house. Our water has been shut off for non-payment. My children have been staying with their father. If I can't pay the $360 water bill to have the water turned back on, he'll be filing for custody of them and I'll lose my kids, too. I received a notice that, in spite of the temporary stay against the mortgage company's forclosure on my house, the mortgage company intends to continue with the forclosure. So... lose the house, lose my kids. I've already lost everything else... including my dignity.

I married the one person on this earth that I every trusted completely. I invested every part of my life in this marriage. I've survived mental torture, death threats, threats of him committing suicide, threats of charges being filed against me for harassment and robbery (the alleged theft of the gifts that his mother gave me when we married!), requests that I send him money, accusations of not caring about his family (I didn't attend his aunt's funeral. I begged him to book my flight to Shimla so I could be there, just as I've begged him to book my flight to come to India to spend time with him, but he refuses... and that's MY FAULT!).

He's never sent me money. I don't know how he spends the money he earns. I've accounted to him for everything I earn and spend. Tell me, when you see the facts and figures, what picture does it paint for you?

My take home pay, after deductions, is $95 usd per week. Multiplied by 52 wks per year, it's $4940 usd per annum. Divide that sum by 12 and you will arrive at an average of $412 usd per month. If the exchange rate is 45 INR to $1 usd, then my monthy take home pay is Rs. 18540. Given the fact that the cost of living in my area is 7-10 times the cost of living in India, I'm able to achieve the same standard of living here in the US that a person in India can achieve on Rs. 2649 per month.

Dhiraj's take home pay, after deductions, is Rs. 54000 per month. That's $1200 usd per month. Figure in the cost of living, and he's able to maintain the same standard of living in India that a man in the US can maintain if he earns $8400 usd per month or $100800 usd per year.

So when you compare apples to apples (and oranges to oranges), the figures in usd are:

Dhiraj - $100800 usd pa Lily - $4940 usd pa

OR--

Dhiraj - Rs. 648000 pa Lily - Rs. 31788 pa

When you look at these figures, he earns more in one month than I earn in one year! and he wants me to send him money?

He says I just want to punish him for having a college degree. I just want my husband to aknowledge his wife and support and protect her. Is it wrong or greedy of me to expect this from my husband? Isn't this a part of his dharma as a householder?

WILL SOMEONE PLEASE ENLIGHTEN ME!?!