- Entry for October 09, 2006 Truth
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Richard H. Rovere is quoted as having said, "[Joseph] McCarthy invented the Multiple Lie—the lie with so many tiny gears and fragile connecting rods that reason exhausted itself in the effort to combat it."
This may be true, but I am convinced that Dhiraj Sharma perfected it. In the 2+yrs we've been married he has spewd more venom, rejection and deceit than I imagined was humanly possible. I find myself, indeed, exhausted in the effort to combat it.
Above all, I would teach him to tell the truth . . . Truth-telling, I have found, is the key to responsible citizenship. The thousands of criminals I have seen in 40 years of law enforcement have had one thing in common: every single one was a liar.
J. Edgar HooverInterestingly enough this appears to be a common trait with my husband as well. The other is that they all loudly proclaim their innocence to anyone who will listen.I have never seasoned a truth with the sauce of a lie in order to digest it more easily.
Marguerite YourcenarI would caution one not to dine with my husband.
Truth is the secret of eloquence and of virtue, the basis of moral authority; it is the highest summit of art and of life.
He that once deceives is ever suspected.
Doesn't Dhiraj have colleagues or friends named Boris and Leo?
The truth will set you free. But first, it will piss you off.
People who are brutally honest get more satisfaction out of the brutality than out of the honesty.
They are sort of ppl who love only money and may harm physically/mentally bride later.
The reply? :
Best Answer - Chosen by Asker
On 22 April 2004, after knowing him for 4 years, and having numerous conversations with his parents and brother, I travelled to India and married Dhiraj. I returned, after 4 days of marriage, to file for his green card.After only 1 month of marriage, he began to say things to me, either online or in phone conversations, that lead me to believe that he was seeing someone else.
After 4 months of marriage, he falsely accused me of cheating on him and said we were through. Not knowing what else to do, I called his father in India. My father-in-law was very understanding and spoke with my husband. I thought that things were going to work out, but he erupted again. When I called his father again, his father began to ask me questions about myself. I was shocked, as after our marriage, Dhiraj had informed me that he had lied to his parents about me so that they would accept me as their daughter-in-law. Accept me, they did. His mother and his brother signed as witnesses when we registered our marriage. However, only a few minutes before I called his father, Dhiraj had told me that he had come clean with his parents. I thought this was another in a long line of lies that he'd been telling me, but when his father began to question me about my divorce, my age, my children and their ages, I thought perhaps Dhiraj was finally turning over a new leaf.
I was wrong! Not only had Dhiraj lid to them, but he never told them the truth. The truth came from me and I have no doubt that he has been lying to them and has told them that he wasn't aware of my details until the day we registered the marriage.
This man has subjected me to extreme mental and emotional torture. He has made promises that he never intended to keep, and he has ruined my family life and my finances. I have been living in poverty in the US, foregoing and government financial assistance because I didn't want to jeopardize his green card status. On top of all of this, he had the nerve to tell me, "I'm in financial trouble here. If you were a good wife, you would be sending me money."
In nutshell, here's an excerpt from my orkut page:
about me:
"Married to Dhiraj Sharma. He works at ITC Infotech, Bangalore. I'm living and working in the US waiting for him to join me here."
I wrote those first 2 sentences more than 6 months ago. Since then, I've spent everything I had to spent a month in India with my husband. Instead of reconnecting with the one person in this world who means most to me, I found myself alone in a strange city, abandonded by my husband who chose to retreat to Delhi and refuse to answer his cell. I went to my husband's residence, only to be told by his landlord, that since November 2005, he's had a woman staying with him that he says is his wife and that he had taken her to Delhi for the holidays. After returning to stay with a family in Pune, I came to know that my husband had been calling the relatives of my friends and their company investors and maligning my character.
So you see, it doesn't matter how good your character is, doesn't matter how high your moral standard is, doesn't matter how intelligent or talented you are... if you marry someone who is an insecure, lying, thieving, self centered, egotistical, adulterous sadist, you have just entrusted your life to someone whose primary goal in life is your destruction. And "Why", you might ask? Because it's the only way for him to feel powerful and superior. Misery loves company. He appearently loathes himself so much that he prefers to call a prostiture his wife instead of the woman his mother approved of and signed as a witness for him to take as his wife. My misery is his happiness. Go figure.
After my trip to Bangalore, I procured a copy of my marriage memorandum. I'm not a hindu, never have been, but the affidavit that I signed that states I was born a Christian, now has the blanks filled in that say "I converted of my own sweet will as I am marrying a hindu boy". There is an affidavit signed by a priest that I have never seen, much less met, stating that he officiated at our marriage vows; vows, I might add, that were never taken.
So I have no marriage, no husband, no money, no dignity, and no life. THIS MAN IS A FRAUD! To add insult to injury, he filed a divorce complaint on a fake marriage, 4 months after he married his Mauritius prostitute! Because of this MONSTER, not only have I had to file for bankruptcy, and have suffered severe mental, physical and emotional problems, but I can't even remarry in the US! Although my marriage is invalid, I used the marriage certificate to change my surname. Without a court order, declaring my marriage void, I can't remarry. The only court with jurisdiction over this "sham marriage" is the family court in Pune.
I can only hope that I live to see the day when that man has suffered for all his lies and the suffereing he has caused. I have no doubt that I will be but one among a growing throng of others that have been praying diligently for that same event.
Source(s):
The stark irony is in, as Paul Harvey would say, "the rest of the story".
In April 2008, I received a phone call from Dhiraj. Apparently, he had obtained a divorce certificate for a our fraud marriage on Dec. 28, 2007. He was sent, by his company, to Boston on Ja. 3, 2008. Three days later, he was in Minneapolis, freezing his keester off. After what I can only assume he expected me to accept as a heartfelt apology and a vow to "change his spots", he proceeded to go on with his life, with complete disregard for the destruction he has created in mine. Just as it has always been, since my "supposed marriage" to him, he is free to live as he pleases and I am held hostage by an inability to prove that I'm free to remarry, and a financial hole that will, in a few short months, have cost me everything I have worked for my entire life.
So much for being honest, responsible and dependable. So much for hard work and diligence. I can honestly say it gets me nowhere. I gave everything, and he gave nothing. He starts over in the US with everything to his credit, and I'm going to have to start over with nothing.
If there is any justice in this world, the only time he ever told me the truth was when he said he has HIV. But I'm not going to hold my breath.
